dead or alive?

Looking at moon, thinking almost every night, I wonder if moon is to be praised for its beauty or the sun? is it that beautiful anyway? is it not the same moon I saw last night? Why am I not bored with it yet? because it is beautiful? there are a lot of beautiful persons but I dont wanna see them every day? so why moon and not those people?

I realized that people have behavior, nature, moods, tendency to ask questions, ability to hurt, possibilities to get hurt and so on. Moon is stable. you love it, hurt it, click it, dont look at it...whatever! it still exists as is.. isn't great? look at it every night or once in 12 months, it is surely to calm u each time..

so is it dead or alive? the moon? does it feels good when I applaud it or does it feels bad when I dont bother to look at it? what if it has an heart. I think, it would have faded away like the way I turning gray!

moments of completeness

I was wondering how I feel when different people touches me for different reasons. be it a professional hand shake, a friendly hug, maternal kiss or whatever. I couldn't recognize the feelings..

Although, I remember how i felt when she first touched me. When she touched me again, and again and again. I felt as if I am complete...as if I need nothing more... as if I had no past. as if I have no future. feeling so deep, so true, to never come out.

the way she looks at me tells that she wont regret it, later today or tomorrow. when she is not around, I can still feel her touches and see into her shy eyes. she has been waiting to see me as much as I waited for her, may be more.


her eyes so sparkling, her breath so warm;
her thoughts are enough to feel her charm..


her touch says there will be a brighter tomorrow, even if not, don't be sorrow.
her touch expresses each of her feeling, be she sad or smiling.

her touch is most cherished, felt and desired;
I cant let her stop, selfish me, even if she is tired.

when dependencies are ditched

I was discussing about my dependencies, over an employee, with a friend three weeks ago. I told her how much trouble I might face if this employee ever resigns. he knows about all the projects we have done so far. he knows about all other employees and clients too. and guess what..................?

Yes! he resigned the very next week. Actually, he tried to ran away. Leaving behind relationship of two years, he gave me ONE DAY NOTICE before he joins his new company.
_______________________________________________________________________
Stephanos: I am worried about u
Stephanos: Dear i want to say something to u. i cannot think what to say
me: its ok..i know what u want to say...say it
Stephanos: today i was going for interview they accepted my job ... want me to join on day after tomorrow
me: u can not join that soon
Stephanos: i tried talk them that i am join after one month but they disagree
me: u must give one month notice...as we discussed earlier
Stephanos: they want early.
me: sam, u must serve one month notice
Stephanos: man i am fed up about this
me: i will hire some one and train for work not before one month
Stephanos: please be accept ? what to do man? Now u got fed up .. because of me!
me: i dont know...just be professional if not a friend....i discuss it before as well..that one month notice is requred..
Stephanos: dear i tried to them, they dont have other way.. i asked them for some other date...but they want immediate , i have accepted this offer from them as i can work from you office half day daily
me: i can not release you then...think of our company too..
Stephanos: i am giving u much offer .. dont give salary of this month to me.. i continue ur work for one month or 2. half days work during weekdays and full day on saturday. PLEASE!
me: u know i never fight for money
me: if u want..take ur salary tommorrow and u can go. but i am only expecting professionalism...half day work wont help me or my company
Stephanos: they giving big salary 29K
Stephanos: i told them i get 22k from your office
me: let us talk tomorrow
Stephanos: bit worried. SOrry for trouble u
__________________________________________________________________________

I really wanted to retain him so I offered him salary what he was being offered from the other company. He didn't stay! He is keen on joining a MNC which guarantees him job for next 10 yrs or so. I could only guarantee a better personal relationship and same salary..not the multi-storey building, neither confrences at 5 star hotels, and certainly not an ambience of 300 staff!

Tough to sleep, eat or concentrate unless he finally left. Unless I knew, now, there is no way he will stay. He wasn't the best programmer or designer, neither the best man. He was my first employee! a friend at office. a colleague.

tough......tough.........tough.....but the show must go on :) and it will!